


Unexpected Guest 4

by killerweasel



Series: Unexpected Guest [4]
Category: Good Omens (TV Series)
Genre: Gen, Maggots are gross
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-15
Updated: 2019-11-15
Packaged: 2021-01-31 05:43:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21441157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/killerweasel/pseuds/killerweasel
Summary: Aziraphale, Hastur, and Gabriel in the same place at the same time. What could possibly go wrong?
Series: Unexpected Guest [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1513961
Comments: 4
Kudos: 79





	Unexpected Guest 4

Title: Unexpected Guest 4  
Fandom: Good Omens (TV Series)  
Characters: Aziraphale, Hastur, Gabriel  
Word Count: 932  
Rating: PG-13  
A/N: After Episode 6.  
Summary: Aziraphale, Hastur, and Gabriel in the same place at the same time. What could possibly go wrong?

Aziraphale is feeding the ducks in the park when he feels a powerful demonic presence nearby. A slightly panicked glance to his left reveals Duke Hastur leaning up against a trash can, smoking a cigarette. Aziraphale smiles brightly at him. "Hastur!"  
  
"Aziraphale." Hastur slowly walks over to where the angel is standing. "Was in the neighborhood and thought I'd say hello." He stares at the ducks and one of them hisses at him. "Birds with attitude. I like that. Bet they'd bite you if you pissed them off."

"Don't irritate my ducks, please." He throws some more corn on the ground. "I find this rather relaxing. I had to deal with a customer at the book shop who just wouldn't leave. He kept insisting I needed to sell him a book!"

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't the point of a shop to sell things?"

"He wouldn't have appreciated it." He's about to toss more food to the ducks when he sees a familiar figure headed down the path. Aziraphale frowns. He should have noticed an Archangel's energy before now. "Is that Gabriel?"

Hastur draws himself up to his full height, bristling with demonic energy. "Why is he here?"

"Sometimes he jogs in the park. I haven't seen him since..." Aziraphale shakes his head. "I should get going, I don't need any trouble."

"Screw that. You were here first." Hastur snaps his fingers as Gabriel gets closer. Both laces of the Archangel's shoes become untied at the same time, sending him falling to the ground. "Well, if it isn't the Holier Than Thou Archangel Fucking Gabriel Wank-Wings himself." He flicks his cigarette at Gabriel's chest, chuckling when it burns a hole in the Archangel's shirt. "What brings someone like you to the surface?"

"You just ruined a perfectly good shirt, asshole." Lavender eyes focus on Aziraphale and Gabriel sneers as he gets to his feet. "Oh. Finally got rid of that snake and went for something far more vile, Aziraphale?"

Aziraphale sputters something as his hands clench into fists. "Excuse me?"

"I know you, don't I?" Gabriel rubs his chin for a moment. "Duke Hastur."

"In the flesh." The smile on Hastur's face is far from nice. "That's weird. You don't feel like an Archangel." He inhales deeply. "Oh, I see. You're being punished. You smell almost human."

"It's only temporary. Apparently trying to punish an angel for preventing Armageddon is frowned upon." After muttering something rather rude under his breath, Gabriel turns to Aziraphale again. "I see you're still looking just as round and soft as ever. Some warrior you turned out to be."

"Did you just call him fat?" Hastur takes a step forward, putting himself between the two angels. "He likes how he looks. And how he looks isn't any of your damn business. He's a proper angel. You're just a dick."

A series of emotions cross Gabriel's face before settling on anger. "That's really funny coming from a demon that looks like a walking corpse and stinks like something a buzzard puked up."

Clearing his throat, Aziraphale tries to get their attention. "Gentlemen, I think we need to take a step back before this gets out of hand."

"You have no idea what I can look like, Gabriel." Something moves under the surface of Hastur's skin. "But you're about to find out." The demon lunges forward and shifts into a massive pile of maggots. They swarm over Gabriel like a tidal wave, completely taking the Archangel by surprise.

"Aziraphale, do something!" Gabriel flails around, trying to dislodge the hundreds of maggots from his body. He covers his eyes with his hands. "Oh God, I can hear them chewing!"

"Hastur, I think you should stop now." Aziraphale's eyes grow wider as the maggots begin to strip away Gabriel's flesh. "Don't discorporate him. He's honestly not worth what will come of this if you do."

For a rather long moment, Aziraphale isn't sure if Hastur will actually listen to him. Then the maggots fall away, reforming into the Duke. Hastur licks his lips and belches loudly.

Gabriel is huddled on the ground with his clothes splattered in angelic and human blood. He jerks away from the hand Aziraphale puts on his shoulder. "Don't touch me, traitor."

"You're not going to be able to heal yourself like this, Gabriel." Aziraphale reaches out again and this time Gabriel holds still. "Just relax." He carefully mends the damage to the Archangel's corporation before restoring the clothing back to its original state. "There. Are you okay?"

"I can still feel them on me." Gabriel shudders. "And inside of me."

"Could be some leftover." Hastur wiggles his fingers. "I might be missing a few." He winks at Aziraphale.

"Hastur!" Aziraphale pinches the bridge of his nose. "Gabriel, if you can be civil, you can come to my book shop and recover a bit." He sighs at the look on Gabriel's face. "It's not a trick. And Hastur will leave you alone, won't he?"

"I guess. You're taking all the fun out of it."

Aziraphale helps Gabriel to his feet. "I know you won't eat and after what I just saw, I'm going to hold off for a bit myself. But I can make you some nice tea." When Gabriel starts to protest, he holds a hand up. "Just think about it on the way over."

On the way to the book shop, it suddenly occurs to Aziraphale that not only does he have a demonic boyfriend, he's also friends with a Duke of Hell and he's currently being nice to Gabriel. Wonders never cease.


End file.
